So unless you just really ignore the world around you, you have probably heard about CBD oil. It is everywhere right now. The question everyone has is, Does it work?
Yes it does is the answer. I have personally been using it since October of 2018. I had such severe back pain I could not sleep through the night. I would wake up and have to reposition myself every two hours. It was horrible to say the least. I never felt rested and my body could not recharge and heal itself. I was so miserable, it was effecting everything. I had no energy to get things done. I also have anxiety which was getting out of control and that was effecting my ability to function.
I was actually on one of my Facebook pages that has to do with work and a lady mentioned it. I decided to ask some questions. After talking for a bit I decided it couldn't make things any worse. I made a purchase and signed up to sell it at the same time. I am so glad I made the choice to use it.
For the first time in two years I actually slept through the night. I was so shocked when the alarm went off and I had not woken up during the night. After a few days I noticed my pain was not really a thing anymore and I could get through my shift at work without feeling like I had been beat up. I was able to be calmer through out the day as well. It was amazing how much better I was doing using a natural product.
I have begun to tell others about my experience because I want everyone to be able to receive the benefits of this great product. It really is an amazing thing. On a completely unintentional side I have also lost 20m pounds. I have not been able to lose weight for years. This was a great side effect to me.
If you want to know more please visit my web site at cbdwithbecky.com and learn about the different products we have. I encourage you to try one of our sample packs to see how it can help you. You will be amazed at what our products can do for you.
About Me
- The Natorette
- Lansing, Michigan, United States
- I am a Mother, a mentor, a business owner, an employee. I am a person I have a busy life and would like to help others deal with their busy lives.
Showing posts with label medical. Show all posts
Showing posts with label medical. Show all posts
Monday, May 27, 2019
Saturday, October 14, 2017
How the Year began
So in previous posts I said I would explain a lot of other things, so here is the start of that. This post will be hard so I will tell you how this year started and then I will highlight other events in another post so I can get through this one without losing it completely.
This year started out with my Dad letting me know my Mom had not been feeling well so she decided to go to the hospital. That was nothing new as my Mom had been in the hospital many times before because she had pneumonia a lot and some times it got bad and she had COPD so she needed help sometime. I asked him did I need to come and was assured that it was just a normal trip and things would be ok. This went on for a few weeks and my Dad got the same answer from Dr.s and relayed it to me saying there was nothing serious happening the infections was just pretty bad and she had developed a UTI so it would just be a little longer .
At this point you are probably thinking why would I not have gone and visited my mom in the hospital after he being there for a few weeks. Well as you may remember my daughter has seizures. Things have been out of control and the hospital was over an hour drive and I also had to work to support me and my daughter. I felt bad but my Dad reassured me that my Mom was ok and a couple times I even chatted with her on the phone so that made me feel a little more comfortable in the situation.
One day I get a call from my Dad and he is crying so I panic. Finally he tells me he got a call and we have to make a decision. I am freaking out because who wants to do that. So I go get my cousin from work down the road I smoke a million cigarettes (I know not the best idea) while we get my aunt and daughter. My cousin goes back to work while me, my daughter , and aunt drive two hours to my Dad who is at his house in shock. More family comes as we talk about what to do. We decide that me and my Dad and daughter will go in the morning to talk to the Dr and get more information.
That was a complete disaster. We get told different stories and that we should not have received that call. Things were not good but they didn't think we were to that point yet. My Mom was responding to us being there and even gave my Dad a kiss. We were Pissed to say the least that they put us through that. Family from out of state was on their way because we thought my Mom was about to die. We visited with her and everyone and after a few days were assured that they were not convinced she was going to die soon. We all go home and for two weeks my Dad tells us how things are getting better she is still responding to him and the Dr's are hopeful. Things feel good.
Then it is February and my Mom's birthday is here and we are excited because she made it another year and things seemed good. My Dad went to visit her and spent most of the day with her and said she was tired but doing good for her situation. It was getting late so he told her that he was going back to the hotel room and would be back in the morning. I had talked to him and her and we planned for us to come visit later because we wanted him to have the weekend with her. It was about 11:00 pm on February 16, 2017 and I had just crawled into bed. My phone lit up and it was my Dad, as I answered I grabbed my daughter and started getting out of bed and putting my shoes on. What happened next has shattered our whole world.
They had called my Dad and said she didn't have much time. Before I even hung up we were almost in the car and time was not real. I had to get gas and bought more smoke (again I know, bad idea). My daughter got a hold of people as I drove for what seemed like forever and got pulled over twice for a broken taillight. We arrived and the strongest woman I know, the woman who taught me to be strong and be a mom was so weak. She barely responded but tried to hang on. We prayed, we brought in a priest for final rights, we told her to hold on, we cried.
On February 17, 2017 at 2:30 AM we had to make the hardest decision we have ever made. After 69 years on Earth, 38 years of marriage, 38 years of being my Mom, I was the reason they got married :),being my daughters Grandma for 16 years, we had to say goodbye. It was the worst day of my life. Her body had shut down, while her brain was working. It was so unreal. This year has been so hard. My Mom was the person I would call when I needed advice. She would tell me straight, she would never tell me what I wanted to hear, but rather what I needed to hear, good or bad. It was the end of the world that we knew and the next week following her death was beyond stressful.
This has been long but I promised. So that is how my year started and it is still not getting much better but that is for another post. I need to get myself back together. Thank you for reading. Unitl next time.
This year started out with my Dad letting me know my Mom had not been feeling well so she decided to go to the hospital. That was nothing new as my Mom had been in the hospital many times before because she had pneumonia a lot and some times it got bad and she had COPD so she needed help sometime. I asked him did I need to come and was assured that it was just a normal trip and things would be ok. This went on for a few weeks and my Dad got the same answer from Dr.s and relayed it to me saying there was nothing serious happening the infections was just pretty bad and she had developed a UTI so it would just be a little longer .At this point you are probably thinking why would I not have gone and visited my mom in the hospital after he being there for a few weeks. Well as you may remember my daughter has seizures. Things have been out of control and the hospital was over an hour drive and I also had to work to support me and my daughter. I felt bad but my Dad reassured me that my Mom was ok and a couple times I even chatted with her on the phone so that made me feel a little more comfortable in the situation.
One day I get a call from my Dad and he is crying so I panic. Finally he tells me he got a call and we have to make a decision. I am freaking out because who wants to do that. So I go get my cousin from work down the road I smoke a million cigarettes (I know not the best idea) while we get my aunt and daughter. My cousin goes back to work while me, my daughter , and aunt drive two hours to my Dad who is at his house in shock. More family comes as we talk about what to do. We decide that me and my Dad and daughter will go in the morning to talk to the Dr and get more information.
Then it is February and my Mom's birthday is here and we are excited because she made it another year and things seemed good. My Dad went to visit her and spent most of the day with her and said she was tired but doing good for her situation. It was getting late so he told her that he was going back to the hotel room and would be back in the morning. I had talked to him and her and we planned for us to come visit later because we wanted him to have the weekend with her. It was about 11:00 pm on February 16, 2017 and I had just crawled into bed. My phone lit up and it was my Dad, as I answered I grabbed my daughter and started getting out of bed and putting my shoes on. What happened next has shattered our whole world.
They had called my Dad and said she didn't have much time. Before I even hung up we were almost in the car and time was not real. I had to get gas and bought more smoke (again I know, bad idea). My daughter got a hold of people as I drove for what seemed like forever and got pulled over twice for a broken taillight. We arrived and the strongest woman I know, the woman who taught me to be strong and be a mom was so weak. She barely responded but tried to hang on. We prayed, we brought in a priest for final rights, we told her to hold on, we cried.
On February 17, 2017 at 2:30 AM we had to make the hardest decision we have ever made. After 69 years on Earth, 38 years of marriage, 38 years of being my Mom, I was the reason they got married :),being my daughters Grandma for 16 years, we had to say goodbye. It was the worst day of my life. Her body had shut down, while her brain was working. It was so unreal. This year has been so hard. My Mom was the person I would call when I needed advice. She would tell me straight, she would never tell me what I wanted to hear, but rather what I needed to hear, good or bad. It was the end of the world that we knew and the next week following her death was beyond stressful.
This has been long but I promised. So that is how my year started and it is still not getting much better but that is for another post. I need to get myself back together. Thank you for reading. Unitl next time.
Sunday, August 20, 2017
Medical ID Bracelet
Before we get started, Yes I did sign up to get an incentive if someone buys one. It was my choice they did not ask me. I am working on a few projects that I will be telling you about in future posts so I am trying to earn money. Why should we listen or buy this item then, is what you might be asking right now.
Well as many of you know my daughter has seizure disorder. This is a game changer for families who are constantly dealing with medical personnel. It puts medical information right there and takes away the stress of possibly forgetting something in an emergency situation. I am in the process of purchasing mine as well. This way if my daughter ends up at the hospital before I can get there they already have medical information at hand. That is a huge relief as a parent to know my child will get the correct assistance when needed instead of them guessing until I get there.
She will be 18 next year and going to college the next so this is a God send really. She can be a little more independent and I can have piece of mind knowing she will have the information she needs to be taken care of. 
I hope you will at least take a look at the product if you have a loved one with medical concerns. You can buy if you want or not no pressure. I just wanted to share with other people that could use some peace of mind. To check it out click the following link http://lddy.no/odq
Thank you for visiting, until next time.
Well as many of you know my daughter has seizure disorder. This is a game changer for families who are constantly dealing with medical personnel. It puts medical information right there and takes away the stress of possibly forgetting something in an emergency situation. I am in the process of purchasing mine as well. This way if my daughter ends up at the hospital before I can get there they already have medical information at hand. That is a huge relief as a parent to know my child will get the correct assistance when needed instead of them guessing until I get there.
She will be 18 next year and going to college the next so this is a God send really. She can be a little more independent and I can have piece of mind knowing she will have the information she needs to be taken care of. I hope you will at least take a look at the product if you have a loved one with medical concerns. You can buy if you want or not no pressure. I just wanted to share with other people that could use some peace of mind. To check it out click the following link http://lddy.no/odq
Thank you for visiting, until next time.
Sunday, July 24, 2016
How I Got Rid Of My Kidney Stone (read till the end)
So as most of you know I have had a couple of kidney stones. If you know anything about them they are painful and not easy to pass once they are of larger size. My first one was 9 mm and required two different surgeries before it finally came out. After that I thought I was good to go and would just need regular heck ups to make sure I was ok.
This was not the case. I ended up with a 6 mm stone at the beginning of this year. I knew before I even went to the hospital what it was. The pain was horrible. If you have ever given birth then take labor pains and times it by a minimum of ten. After going to the hospital I was given pain meds and told to go to my specialist. By the time I saw him the pain was better so we decided to wait. Then a week later I went back. Not in pain I made the choice to wait. My Dr. told me if I waited much longer I risked damage so surgery was looking like my only option. I was told I would need another CT scan to see what was happening then we could decide from there.
Well for a couple of reasons I won't waste time explaining I didn't get the CT for another month. In that time I decided to do some research on naturals ways to get rid of kidney stones. I read multiple articles and learned of the same basic ingredients people had used with success. Mind you there were a lot of opinions on how to get rid of them and how much of certain things you should eat or drink. Some people swore by methods that were illegal as well. I was not going that route. I decided to use the ingredients that came up the most but do it my way.
For two weeks before the scan I used my remedy in hopes that it would at least shrink the stone enough they would let me wait to pass it. After the scan it was almost a month before I saw the Dr. I went in that day expecting to hear the words surgery. I am not scared of surgery by any means but as a single parent it is hard to find a ride and set up a person to be with my princess in case of a seizure.
The Dr. came in ad to my surprise said I was fine. I didn't need to come back for a whole year. The stone was gone. As the nurse was leaving she asked if I had passed it because she had never heard of some one passing a stone that big on their own. I told her I was just as surprised and told her what I had done. She was very impressed
So here is what you need to get started. Lemons, pure honey, coconut oil, and organic apple cider vinegar. I know seems to easy but it really is. During the day you will make what I call a tea basically. Get a coffee or tea mug and squeeze a half of lemon into the cup. Then put in honey I just put in what looked about a teaspoon. Then add a tablespoon of coconut oil. Then fill with hot water. I used my Kurig. I filled the cup about half full of water put it in the Kurig then did the ingredients and then pushed start. Drink the whole thing. Later in the evening you need a large water bottle. You put a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar in it and fill the rest of the way with water. It taste bad really I will not lie, but it works. Do this for 2 weeks. After that you can do it a couple times a week just to stay flushed out.
Why it works. Here is what I learned. The lemon and apple cider vinegar dissolve the stone over time. The honey act as an antibacterial to keep your tube clean and repair quicker. Stones have sharp edges that shred the tube as it passes. This is where the oil helps it lubricates the tube to help the stone slide easier. So there you have it. I know this was long but hopefully it can help some one else.
This was not the case. I ended up with a 6 mm stone at the beginning of this year. I knew before I even went to the hospital what it was. The pain was horrible. If you have ever given birth then take labor pains and times it by a minimum of ten. After going to the hospital I was given pain meds and told to go to my specialist. By the time I saw him the pain was better so we decided to wait. Then a week later I went back. Not in pain I made the choice to wait. My Dr. told me if I waited much longer I risked damage so surgery was looking like my only option. I was told I would need another CT scan to see what was happening then we could decide from there.
Well for a couple of reasons I won't waste time explaining I didn't get the CT for another month. In that time I decided to do some research on naturals ways to get rid of kidney stones. I read multiple articles and learned of the same basic ingredients people had used with success. Mind you there were a lot of opinions on how to get rid of them and how much of certain things you should eat or drink. Some people swore by methods that were illegal as well. I was not going that route. I decided to use the ingredients that came up the most but do it my way.
For two weeks before the scan I used my remedy in hopes that it would at least shrink the stone enough they would let me wait to pass it. After the scan it was almost a month before I saw the Dr. I went in that day expecting to hear the words surgery. I am not scared of surgery by any means but as a single parent it is hard to find a ride and set up a person to be with my princess in case of a seizure.
The Dr. came in ad to my surprise said I was fine. I didn't need to come back for a whole year. The stone was gone. As the nurse was leaving she asked if I had passed it because she had never heard of some one passing a stone that big on their own. I told her I was just as surprised and told her what I had done. She was very impressed
So here is what you need to get started. Lemons, pure honey, coconut oil, and organic apple cider vinegar. I know seems to easy but it really is. During the day you will make what I call a tea basically. Get a coffee or tea mug and squeeze a half of lemon into the cup. Then put in honey I just put in what looked about a teaspoon. Then add a tablespoon of coconut oil. Then fill with hot water. I used my Kurig. I filled the cup about half full of water put it in the Kurig then did the ingredients and then pushed start. Drink the whole thing. Later in the evening you need a large water bottle. You put a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar in it and fill the rest of the way with water. It taste bad really I will not lie, but it works. Do this for 2 weeks. After that you can do it a couple times a week just to stay flushed out.
Friday, June 24, 2016
Hello
Hey out there. Sorry it has been awhile but so much has gone on lately. It is one thing after another around here. Just when I get one thing done something else seems to pop up. I know life can be crazy but it is just a hot mess right now.
I have my kidney stone but it is just sitting there and I have had two double ear infections and seriously need looked at and I no longer work. You may be thinking well go to the Dr. right? Well that is the next bomb, I was told I make to much money money to get medicaid any longer. Then I was told I would have to buy y own insurance.
Ok so what money am I supposed to use to do that? I mean it is not like you get extra money when you get unemployment. You get less so how is it that when I had a job I was eligible but now I have temporary income and I make to much? So I am now trying to find insurance which I have always gotten from my employer so I have no idea what I am doing.
In an attempt to get more money I decided to cash out part of my 401K and then put some in my in my IRA to build it up some. It seemed like a good idea. I could bump up my checking account and retirement at the same time. Well something happened and they sent the money to my employer instead but I no longer have an account with them so now I have no idea where my money is.
These are just a few of the things that have been going on. It has been interesting to say the least. Hopefully your days are going a little better than mine. :) Next time I hope it will be sooner and I will have something more exciting to talk about.
I have my kidney stone but it is just sitting there and I have had two double ear infections and seriously need looked at and I no longer work. You may be thinking well go to the Dr. right? Well that is the next bomb, I was told I make to much money money to get medicaid any longer. Then I was told I would have to buy y own insurance.
Ok so what money am I supposed to use to do that? I mean it is not like you get extra money when you get unemployment. You get less so how is it that when I had a job I was eligible but now I have temporary income and I make to much? So I am now trying to find insurance which I have always gotten from my employer so I have no idea what I am doing.
In an attempt to get more money I decided to cash out part of my 401K and then put some in my in my IRA to build it up some. It seemed like a good idea. I could bump up my checking account and retirement at the same time. Well something happened and they sent the money to my employer instead but I no longer have an account with them so now I have no idea where my money is.
These are just a few of the things that have been going on. It has been interesting to say the least. Hopefully your days are going a little better than mine. :) Next time I hope it will be sooner and I will have something more exciting to talk about.
Wednesday, May 11, 2016
Just Talking
So things have been a little crazy. I have my kidney stone and I am trying to avoid surgical removal but my Dr. is starting to push it. My daughter was very sick over the weekend and then missed three days of school with it being so close to the end. I am working with her to try to get her grades to where they should be but it is hard when she is sick a lot between migraines, seizures, and regular illness. Her grades are not that bad all things considered but I know she wants to do better, and I know she absolutely can.
At least I am home right now so that has been extra helpful during this time. I am really working on ideas to stay home permanently. I have already researched insurance for individuals so that I know what it will cost each month to insure us on my own. Now it is time to start putting my skills to use and seeing what can pull off. There are plenty of people who have figured out how to make money at home and still pay bills and such. If they can I am determined to figure it out for myself.
My next post will have some more helpful hints on how to earn some extra money. I have been doing very well. I just bought my daughter some more of her medical stuff she needed and didn't pay a cent and her party is pretty much covered other than the actual day of and a hoop skirt for the dress. I have actually never had this much money in my accounts at once other than tax time. I have been doing my best to save money as much as I can. I did spend some more money on a couple of my credit cards but it was for a gift and my house, but I have only used them about 3 times in the month and a half that I have been home.
Our journey together is one that will take some time but in the end will be worth it. If you have any success stories I would love to hear them.
At least I am home right now so that has been extra helpful during this time. I am really working on ideas to stay home permanently. I have already researched insurance for individuals so that I know what it will cost each month to insure us on my own. Now it is time to start putting my skills to use and seeing what can pull off. There are plenty of people who have figured out how to make money at home and still pay bills and such. If they can I am determined to figure it out for myself.
My next post will have some more helpful hints on how to earn some extra money. I have been doing very well. I just bought my daughter some more of her medical stuff she needed and didn't pay a cent and her party is pretty much covered other than the actual day of and a hoop skirt for the dress. I have actually never had this much money in my accounts at once other than tax time. I have been doing my best to save money as much as I can. I did spend some more money on a couple of my credit cards but it was for a gift and my house, but I have only used them about 3 times in the month and a half that I have been home.
Our journey together is one that will take some time but in the end will be worth it. If you have any success stories I would love to hear them.
Sunday, May 1, 2016
Health Update
So Friday I went to the ER and found out I had another kidney stone. I had symptoms for a few days but I am bad about getting checked out. I always put other things ahead of my pain. I know that I should listen to my body more but I just have things to do so if it isn't too bad I just keep going. Well on Thursday night my body was really letting me know it had enough and by Friday morning it was telling me it was time to go, so after the water heater repair people finished I went in.
This is the second time I have had one and it is the worst. It is the only thing I have found that beat childbirth and that is painful enough. Although when you understand what is happening with a kidney stone you realize it is about the same principle of pushing a watermelon out a hole the size of a pea. If you have never had to go through either of these there is really no way for you to understand this type of pain. If you have done one or the other then you know the pain I am talking about. If you are like me and have done both, well you deserve and award.
They gave me meds to help and decided this time it is small enough that they hope it will pass on its own. While I am not looking forward to passing it I am hoping it does because I do not want to do surgery again. The last one I had was so big that even after placing a stint it still would not pass so they had to surgically break it up so it could come out. That was not fun and I have had lower back pain every morning in that spot since.
I go see the dr. for a check up in the morning and hopefully it will be good news. I am hoping they tell me it is passing along well and should be out in a few more days. Unfortunately between the meds and pain there was not enough energy to make posts so I am hoping to get caught back up soon.
Keep up the good work on paying down the debt and building your savings. You are doing great because you are trying. We are in this together.
This is the second time I have had one and it is the worst. It is the only thing I have found that beat childbirth and that is painful enough. Although when you understand what is happening with a kidney stone you realize it is about the same principle of pushing a watermelon out a hole the size of a pea. If you have never had to go through either of these there is really no way for you to understand this type of pain. If you have done one or the other then you know the pain I am talking about. If you are like me and have done both, well you deserve and award.
They gave me meds to help and decided this time it is small enough that they hope it will pass on its own. While I am not looking forward to passing it I am hoping it does because I do not want to do surgery again. The last one I had was so big that even after placing a stint it still would not pass so they had to surgically break it up so it could come out. That was not fun and I have had lower back pain every morning in that spot since.
I go see the dr. for a check up in the morning and hopefully it will be good news. I am hoping they tell me it is passing along well and should be out in a few more days. Unfortunately between the meds and pain there was not enough energy to make posts so I am hoping to get caught back up soon.
Keep up the good work on paying down the debt and building your savings. You are doing great because you are trying. We are in this together.
Wednesday, January 6, 2016
Slightly Rough Day
So as some of you know my daughter suffers from neurological issues. Most days are ok with a little confusion over small things. She does her best to go to school as much as possible and tries to be positive as much as she can. She is always worried about her friends and would do anything to help anyone. She is my special princess.
Today was not a usual day. She missed almost the whole school day and finals are in two weeks so that is tough. She basically had short term memory loss for the whole day. It was 9 pm and she still thought it was dinner time. It is a little scary right now but I am still working to stay positive. I know God is with us during this time, I just wish that made me feel better about going to sleep. Tomorrow could be a completely normal day or this could be the beginning of a tough week,
I think it would be easier to handle if I had more answers. They can't tell me why she has seizures and migraines all the time. They can't tell me if she will grow out of it or if we even have the right meds yet. That is the hardest part for me. I want to know what is going on and how I can help but I don't and I can't.
I want to help my princess but there is nothing I can do to make it better. I just have to sit back and watch as she suffers and I can't do anything for her. She depends on me to keep her safe and I can't against this particular situation.
Today was not a usual day. She missed almost the whole school day and finals are in two weeks so that is tough. She basically had short term memory loss for the whole day. It was 9 pm and she still thought it was dinner time. It is a little scary right now but I am still working to stay positive. I know God is with us during this time, I just wish that made me feel better about going to sleep. Tomorrow could be a completely normal day or this could be the beginning of a tough week,
I think it would be easier to handle if I had more answers. They can't tell me why she has seizures and migraines all the time. They can't tell me if she will grow out of it or if we even have the right meds yet. That is the hardest part for me. I want to know what is going on and how I can help but I don't and I can't.
I want to help my princess but there is nothing I can do to make it better. I just have to sit back and watch as she suffers and I can't do anything for her. She depends on me to keep her safe and I can't against this particular situation.
Friday, January 1, 2016
Getting Going
So I am trying to start the new year by getting my life and home in order. The hard part is doing it with chronic pain and chronic fatigue. The problem is you get motivated to get things done but have no energy to do it. Your body and mind are exhausted but you attempt things any way and that only leads to more pain and exhaustion.
I really do try to keep going and get stuff done. I do not want my daughter to think I am lazy and that it is ok not to get stuff done but then I suffer later and can not do stuff that I want to do with her, further complicated by her seizures and chronic issues we are stuck in a cycle. I want her to know that it is ok to live but showing her is a little harder than that.
This year I am claiming it is going to be a better year. I am believing it. I am going to attempt the gym more and go to church more often. I want my daughter to know it is ok to be tired but you can not give up. I am pushing through this year to show her there is more to life than the computer and couch.
I hope you are having a blessed day and enjoying the first day of 2016.
I really do try to keep going and get stuff done. I do not want my daughter to think I am lazy and that it is ok not to get stuff done but then I suffer later and can not do stuff that I want to do with her, further complicated by her seizures and chronic issues we are stuck in a cycle. I want her to know that it is ok to live but showing her is a little harder than that.
This year I am claiming it is going to be a better year. I am believing it. I am going to attempt the gym more and go to church more often. I want my daughter to know it is ok to be tired but you can not give up. I am pushing through this year to show her there is more to life than the computer and couch.
I hope you are having a blessed day and enjoying the first day of 2016.
Saturday, November 14, 2015
Need a Nap
I am soooo exhausted lately. I have no energy and I just want to sleep all the time. I know I should go work out or something so I would have more energy but I just want to sleep. It is horrible because no mater how much or little I sleep I have no energy.
I have asked the doctors and they have no answer. Now that I am not pregnant that is not a reason but they can not give me a better one. I just want to be able to make my to do list and then actually be able to do it. I have basically sat on my couch all day today wishing it was bed time.
Hopefully tomorrow I will have the energy to be able to get some stuff done. I have a ton of stuff that I need to get done at my house and my other house too. My daughter will be at her dad's house so there will be no distraction as far as making sure she doesn't have a seizure and that sort of thing I can just get to work and do my stuff so hopefully I can make it.
I have been avoiding going to my dr. because he doesn't know I am not pregnant anymore and I really do not want to have to talk about it, but I really need to get some answers. I do not want to be the person who is trapped in their home because they can no longer function properly or because I have to be on so many medications that I feel like a zombie any way.
Here is to having a good day tomorrow. I am going to think positive and just plan on a good day so hopefully I will pump myself up a little and make it happen.
Hopefully tomorrow I will have the energy to be able to get some stuff done. I have a ton of stuff that I need to get done at my house and my other house too. My daughter will be at her dad's house so there will be no distraction as far as making sure she doesn't have a seizure and that sort of thing I can just get to work and do my stuff so hopefully I can make it.
I have been avoiding going to my dr. because he doesn't know I am not pregnant anymore and I really do not want to have to talk about it, but I really need to get some answers. I do not want to be the person who is trapped in their home because they can no longer function properly or because I have to be on so many medications that I feel like a zombie any way.
Here is to having a good day tomorrow. I am going to think positive and just plan on a good day so hopefully I will pump myself up a little and make it happen.
Friday, October 9, 2015
Weight Update
So I am down 5 pounds. It is not a ton but it is a start. I have continued to use the smoothies with the protein powder. I have tried not to eat fast food as much and keep the sugary drinks low. I will never completely cut out #coke but I do try to not over do it either. My goal is no more than one a day but some times I have more than that and it is ok too. I will be attempting to go back to the gym starting Monday however I have been in quite a bit of pain so we shall see how that starts out.
I am not trying to starve myself nor deprive myself. I am just trying to be a healthier me and a more confident me. You do not have to be a size 2 in order to be happy. If you are being healthy and you are you are happy at a size 10 then that is fine too. It is all about how you feel about yourself and if you are happy. Now I am not promoting being 300 pounds and thinking that is fine but I am not saying you have to be a twig either. If what you are doing is making you unhealthy or unhappy then you should fix it. You do not want to die at 35 because you loved cheeseburgers too much but having them now and then is not the end of the world
I will continue my journey until I am happy with the results. I am not sure what size that will make me. I do know that what ever size I end up it will be what I am happy with and not a number that some chart has labeled me as needing to be.
I am not trying to starve myself nor deprive myself. I am just trying to be a healthier me and a more confident me. You do not have to be a size 2 in order to be happy. If you are being healthy and you are you are happy at a size 10 then that is fine too. It is all about how you feel about yourself and if you are happy. Now I am not promoting being 300 pounds and thinking that is fine but I am not saying you have to be a twig either. If what you are doing is making you unhealthy or unhappy then you should fix it. You do not want to die at 35 because you loved cheeseburgers too much but having them now and then is not the end of the world
I will continue my journey until I am happy with the results. I am not sure what size that will make me. I do know that what ever size I end up it will be what I am happy with and not a number that some chart has labeled me as needing to be.
Sunday, September 27, 2015
Moving Forwrd
So I have been writing about my pregnancy lately. It was crazy to find out in the first place and then to find out it is in jeopardy. I have had to sit and think about my options as it pertains to every one. I have severe health issues and do I want to go all the rest of the months for nothing. I can barely take care of my daughter that already has health issues and there are many months to go.
I have an appointment on Tuesday and I am going to discuss ending the pregnancy. I know that this is a very controversial issue and many people will be offended by my decision. I must say I never thought I would ever even think about doing it, but here I am faced with a million uncertainties and a child that is 15 and quite often still needs my help to shower. I know that I may lose readers and people might even leave nasty comments.
I understand where those people are coming from I really do. I know what I am saying and I know what it means if I go through with it. It is going to be very painful and emotional and I will have to live with the decision for the rest of my life. Let me just say that it has not been easy to think about. I have had to think about all the pros and cons for the last month now. It is really hard to even think about. The alternative is just as hard. I may have to watch my child suffer because I can,t help her or know that I am going to go full term for nothing or have another child that needs full attention.
How do I say one child needs me more than the other. How do I decide which one is more important than the other? Do I leave one suffering while I help the other in distress? What if they are both in distress at the same time? There are so many factors to consider. There is also my health to consider. If I am too sick to do anything then who takes care of them? If I go full term and my health gets so bad do I recover? What about my daughter who is here how can I be 100% for her?
I understand people will be mad. Though as I have pointed out it is not always about just ending things. There are many reasons why I am leaning toward this decision. It isn't always about finances or just using it for birth control. Some women have real reasons they may have to make this choice. I am sure people are going to have an opinion but at the end of the day it is about what is best for everyone.
I have an appointment on Tuesday and I am going to discuss ending the pregnancy. I know that this is a very controversial issue and many people will be offended by my decision. I must say I never thought I would ever even think about doing it, but here I am faced with a million uncertainties and a child that is 15 and quite often still needs my help to shower. I know that I may lose readers and people might even leave nasty comments.
I understand where those people are coming from I really do. I know what I am saying and I know what it means if I go through with it. It is going to be very painful and emotional and I will have to live with the decision for the rest of my life. Let me just say that it has not been easy to think about. I have had to think about all the pros and cons for the last month now. It is really hard to even think about. The alternative is just as hard. I may have to watch my child suffer because I can,t help her or know that I am going to go full term for nothing or have another child that needs full attention.
How do I say one child needs me more than the other. How do I decide which one is more important than the other? Do I leave one suffering while I help the other in distress? What if they are both in distress at the same time? There are so many factors to consider. There is also my health to consider. If I am too sick to do anything then who takes care of them? If I go full term and my health gets so bad do I recover? What about my daughter who is here how can I be 100% for her?
I understand people will be mad. Though as I have pointed out it is not always about just ending things. There are many reasons why I am leaning toward this decision. It isn't always about finances or just using it for birth control. Some women have real reasons they may have to make this choice. I am sure people are going to have an opinion but at the end of the day it is about what is best for everyone.
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
Sad News
This will probably be a short post but wanted to share. I was trying to share being pregnant and be honest about my experience. Well the sad truth is it does not look good and I will probably not be able to continue.
I have not known for even a month so that lessons the blow a little but it is still hard to think about all the same. As I am single and older I will not have another opportunity for this experience again. It is hard to process that idea. I do however have a beautiful 15 year old daughter and I will continue to be the best mom to her that I know how and that will never change
I have not known for even a month so that lessons the blow a little but it is still hard to think about all the same. As I am single and older I will not have another opportunity for this experience again. It is hard to process that idea. I do however have a beautiful 15 year old daughter and I will continue to be the best mom to her that I know how and that will never change
Friday, September 4, 2015
Not Feeling The Love
My body is out to get me at this point. Everything is hurting and a lot of problems are popping up. Sadly some of them are untreatable while pregnant so if it is positive I have them then I am really not sure what is going to happen. My body will shut down slowly as the baby drains every bit of energy I have left from fighting so hard. This is very dangerous for me, not to mention my daughter here since she does have seizures. The other option is to treat things so I am better but then I risk the baby.
I am so at odds here really. I mean I have my daughter and myself to think about but how do you say that one life is more important than the other. It is a very confusing situation really. Then they say oh but it could be nothing too. Although let us run all these other tests because we really have no idea.
It is very scary to be honest. I want us all to be healthy but I have no idea what is going on and I am very concerned with the situation. I have no idea how to handle this really. I am not prepared to have to make any major choices. This pregnancy has been crazy enough with out adding more stress. I really am so at odds with this whole thing.
I am just going day by day. Trying to stay positive about the outcome. I am sure things will be ok . It is just hard not knowing what is happening, all the while being in pain all the time.
I am so at odds here really. I mean I have my daughter and myself to think about but how do you say that one life is more important than the other. It is a very confusing situation really. Then they say oh but it could be nothing too. Although let us run all these other tests because we really have no idea.
It is very scary to be honest. I want us all to be healthy but I have no idea what is going on and I am very concerned with the situation. I have no idea how to handle this really. I am not prepared to have to make any major choices. This pregnancy has been crazy enough with out adding more stress. I really am so at odds with this whole thing.
I am just going day by day. Trying to stay positive about the outcome. I am sure things will be ok . It is just hard not knowing what is happening, all the while being in pain all the time.
Wednesday, September 2, 2015
Another Day of Testing
So as we have been discussing pregnancy in honest detail today took a crazy turn. They still do not have answers for me about the extra stuff that is going on. I feel awful all the time. This is not all sparkles and rainbows at all. The testing sucks a whole lot. Blood draws and urine tests then they were pushing on my ovaries which are what started the testing that found the baby. I wanted to crawl off the exam table.
Then I have to make amends with the fact that this pregnancy might not last any way due to other factors and health reasons. That was weird to hear really. I am older and things get more complicated and then there is the fact of health and everything that I am already prone to issues with.
I have only known for about a week now so it really hasn't affected me either way to be completely honest. The dad has said he will be supportive no matter what happens. He is by my side figuratively speaking as much as I need him. He has been great for an ear everyday so that has been nice. My daughter's father made me as miserable as possible during my whole pregnancy. Having some one to just listen to my frustration is more helpful than you can imagine.
For some this all might be too honest. I think it is only fair that we can really discuss the reality of the situation. Not all pregnancies are the same. Not everyone has the same support system that is super supportive and there every second. Not everyone has the easiest most pleasant experience either. I apologize if it is too honest but I think it is fair to everyone to get all the details in an honest fashion.
Then I have to make amends with the fact that this pregnancy might not last any way due to other factors and health reasons. That was weird to hear really. I am older and things get more complicated and then there is the fact of health and everything that I am already prone to issues with.
I have only known for about a week now so it really hasn't affected me either way to be completely honest. The dad has said he will be supportive no matter what happens. He is by my side figuratively speaking as much as I need him. He has been great for an ear everyday so that has been nice. My daughter's father made me as miserable as possible during my whole pregnancy. Having some one to just listen to my frustration is more helpful than you can imagine.
For some this all might be too honest. I think it is only fair that we can really discuss the reality of the situation. Not all pregnancies are the same. Not everyone has the same support system that is super supportive and there every second. Not everyone has the easiest most pleasant experience either. I apologize if it is too honest but I think it is fair to everyone to get all the details in an honest fashion.
Tuesday, September 1, 2015
And It Just Keeps Coming
I have decided to focus on real talk about this pregnancy. People are always talking about how great it is to be pregnant. Well some times it is not and I think we should be able to talk about those things too.
So as much trouble as I am already having with this whole pregnancy thing, now I found out that all the medical stuff that was tested when this was discovered was messed up. They contradicted each other and now I have no idea what else is wrong with me.
I have come to understand that I may not even stay pregnant. I may have to give up the idea due to, too many other complications going on. I have to make choices based on the facts and since I already have a child here that I need to take care of. She has medical things that require extra attention.
I have so many emotions right now. Confusion is the biggest. I am not really attached but I feel guilty about choices being made. I worry about my daughter but she seems to not be fully interested either so I probably don't have to worry about her but I do. I have talked to the father and he says he will still be there emotionally for me no matter what happens. That is helpful at least, even if that is all he can offer right now I will take.
My body is having so many problems it is unreal. I am not quite 4 months but I already feel like I am due now. I am miserable and if I go to term I will be in so much pain it will be unreal.
So as much trouble as I am already having with this whole pregnancy thing, now I found out that all the medical stuff that was tested when this was discovered was messed up. They contradicted each other and now I have no idea what else is wrong with me.
I have come to understand that I may not even stay pregnant. I may have to give up the idea due to, too many other complications going on. I have to make choices based on the facts and since I already have a child here that I need to take care of. She has medical things that require extra attention.
I have so many emotions right now. Confusion is the biggest. I am not really attached but I feel guilty about choices being made. I worry about my daughter but she seems to not be fully interested either so I probably don't have to worry about her but I do. I have talked to the father and he says he will still be there emotionally for me no matter what happens. That is helpful at least, even if that is all he can offer right now I will take.
My body is having so many problems it is unreal. I am not quite 4 months but I already feel like I am due now. I am miserable and if I go to term I will be in so much pain it will be unreal.
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
This Evening Was an Event That Can bring Some Stress
So tonight was conferences. It is a time that can either be exciting or miserable. Kids worry about grades and what their parents will say if they get a back grade. Parents worry how their child is doing and if teachers are secretly judging them for these bad grades.
For us it is a combination of both. My daughter can do really well in school. The issue is on top of her ADHD she also has seizure disorder. This leads to a lot of missed days of school. This then leads to built up assignments and then it is hard to catch up and take the quizzes and tests. I know this is hard on my daughter and it is hard for me as a parent. I know she needs to get good grades and be in school but the seizures take a lot out of her. She once slept for 15 hours after a seizure.
She is doing good in some classes and not so good in others. I know she can do well but I also know how hard she struggles. It is like a roller coaster. She has excelled in classes that she has always struggled in and is doing not so well in classes she has always done well in.
I fear she will be held back which has already happened once when she was younger. I don't want her to feel bad about herself but it is hard to punish a child who has a legitimate reason for being behind. It is a real battle. She gets frustrated and I get frustrated then you really get nowhere.
Do you have a child with medical issues that make school harder? What do you do to help them with their struggle? I would really like to hear from other parents on how they cope with these issues.
For us it is a combination of both. My daughter can do really well in school. The issue is on top of her ADHD she also has seizure disorder. This leads to a lot of missed days of school. This then leads to built up assignments and then it is hard to catch up and take the quizzes and tests. I know this is hard on my daughter and it is hard for me as a parent. I know she needs to get good grades and be in school but the seizures take a lot out of her. She once slept for 15 hours after a seizure.She is doing good in some classes and not so good in others. I know she can do well but I also know how hard she struggles. It is like a roller coaster. She has excelled in classes that she has always struggled in and is doing not so well in classes she has always done well in.
I fear she will be held back which has already happened once when she was younger. I don't want her to feel bad about herself but it is hard to punish a child who has a legitimate reason for being behind. It is a real battle. She gets frustrated and I get frustrated then you really get nowhere.
Do you have a child with medical issues that make school harder? What do you do to help them with their struggle? I would really like to hear from other parents on how they cope with these issues.
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
The Beginning Of A Long Journey
We all have things we don't like. Some we can change and some we can't. Mine is one that I can take control of. I plan to undo some very unhealthy damage to my body. It has been happening over the course of about 8 years and I finally really just said this is it. I have to make a change.
Due to medical issues I started putting on weight. It happened very quickly in a matter of 8 months I grew 2 dress sizes but hadn't changed anything I was doing. I even started exercising more and nothing changed. I eventually gave up and started getting bigger. It took the Dr's 2 years before they gave me a diagnoses of something I could actually battle. Unfortunately by this time I had given up and over the next 6 years I gained over 100 pounds and 8 more sizes. It was bad.
I moved back to MI a year and a half ago and I did lose 30 pounds so I was getting excited. Then real life kicked in my body got stressed out and now I have gained back 10 of those pounds. I am very upset with myself for not staying committed to losing all the weight I can. Well things are about to change. I am sharing pictures of what I look like now so you can see how things progress. I can't tell you how this will turn out a year from now but I am going to really try hard to make it better.
I am going to put it out there and let you guys follow me on my journey to get healthy again. I have a gym I pay for but don't use so that needs to change, I have food at home but get tired and lazy so I eat out to much. This has to stop. I literally have people asking me when I am due and I lost weight so I am not happy. I hope that through this time I will inspire others to take their health back. Am I some crazy health freak? No, not by any means, but I am tired of being unhealthy. I don't get work out crazy and I don't buy tons of health food. I am just a regular person looking to feel better.
I hope that you will follow me and be inspired by my journey and get back on track with your journey as well. No matter what it is get back to it and make yourself happy.
Due to medical issues I started putting on weight. It happened very quickly in a matter of 8 months I grew 2 dress sizes but hadn't changed anything I was doing. I even started exercising more and nothing changed. I eventually gave up and started getting bigger. It took the Dr's 2 years before they gave me a diagnoses of something I could actually battle. Unfortunately by this time I had given up and over the next 6 years I gained over 100 pounds and 8 more sizes. It was bad.
I moved back to MI a year and a half ago and I did lose 30 pounds so I was getting excited. Then real life kicked in my body got stressed out and now I have gained back 10 of those pounds. I am very upset with myself for not staying committed to losing all the weight I can. Well things are about to change. I am sharing pictures of what I look like now so you can see how things progress. I can't tell you how this will turn out a year from now but I am going to really try hard to make it better.I am going to put it out there and let you guys follow me on my journey to get healthy again. I have a gym I pay for but don't use so that needs to change, I have food at home but get tired and lazy so I eat out to much. This has to stop. I literally have people asking me when I am due and I lost weight so I am not happy. I hope that through this time I will inspire others to take their health back. Am I some crazy health freak? No, not by any means, but I am tired of being unhealthy. I don't get work out crazy and I don't buy tons of health food. I am just a regular person looking to feel better.
I hope that you will follow me and be inspired by my journey and get back on track with your journey as well. No matter what it is get back to it and make yourself happy.
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