So I am working on a lot of new things this year and honestly it is getting overwhelming. I have tried being positive more each day, but the reality is that some days are hard. Nothing seems to be going right and no matter how hard you try you just can not turn things around. I just had so many plans for this year and it isn't going as easy or as well as I planned.
As a matter of fact everything seems to be heading the opposite way of how I thought it would go. The more I try the farther backwards I seem to go. I have been home and separated for four years. It is time for things to start turning around. I was headed on a good path and then it is like something snapped and now I am spiraling backwards again.
It is rough to really want to get out of your situation but you seem to just keep repeating the same day over and over. Some times I feel like I am in the living in the movie Ground Hog Day. I wake up and do the same thing every day. If I had a stalker it wouldn't be hard for them to track me down since my schedule is always the same.
Most people fear change. They want to stay in their comfort zone and never have to do anything different but I am ready for change. I want a lot of change. I would be happy with just about everything changing. I want things to improve. I have so much that is just making me feel down that if even one thing would start turning around then it would give hope to keep pushing.
I really intend to keep working to be positive and be happy with what I do have because I know things can be a lot worse. I just do not want things to get that bad because I can not turn things around or think in a more positive manner.