I know I said it was going to be about savings right now but I have had some days that are very draining. Things have been so backwards and I think I keep making it worse. I am not sure I am really listening to my inner voice. I feel disconnected from every thing right now.
I should be feeling excited and a little sad because my daughter is about to be a teenager. Instead I am struggling with things that are going on around me. I am praying for guidance but I will be honest I don't think I am getting it. Not that something is wrong with God but there is something wrong with me receiving his grace and mercy.
I have been struggling with this for some time. I know he is there and I have no doubt that he really does do miracles. I just have not figured it out yet. I don't think that I myself am capable of getting it. Again don't get me wrong I am NOT anti God, I just feel that something in me blocks me from getting all that he has to offer.
This is all for today. I am drained from the last few days so I am going to get ready for bed early. Have a great night.